I don’t live in reality.
This realization has revolutionized the way I be in the world.
Thank you, Landmark Forum, for changing my life.
I learned that my reasons and stories go deeper than I ever imagined.
I learned that I apply meaning to everything and that meaning isn’t the truth. In every situation there is “what happened,” and the “story” I apply to it. I create a story for everything and when I’m forced to evaluate the truth, like I did this weekend, I realize my story is completely made up.
Here’s a real life example from this morning:
What happened is Preston said, quite vehemently, that he doesn’t like it when he finds his glasses face down because they can get scratched. My story, which I confuse with the truth, is that he doesn’t appreciate how much I clean up, that he’s being mean to me, that he likes to bicker over small things.
I thought these thoughts for a couple of seconds and then caught myself because I realized that I didn’t have to assign any meaning to what he said.
Another example from the weekend was how we feel pressured into buying something. Our leader, Trevor, stated there is no such thing as feeling pressured. It doesn’t exist.
Case in point: I go into a Honda dealership and they tell me that there is only one red Honda CRV left. If I don’t sign today, there are 2 other people waiting in line to purchase it. This is what happened.
I, however, walk away saying, “Oh, I felt so pressured to make a decision. I didn’t like Mike. He was so pushy. I’m not ready to make a decision. I hate Honda. I’m never going back.” That’s the story.
See how pressure is a story we conjured up out of an experience, but it doesn’t actually exist?
I find this insight to be so powerful.
Natasha Dern wrote a great article describing our version of reality as an illusion. Check it out.
I’m a little nervous, like Bambi taking his first steps, because I am so used to assigning meaning to everything. I am unlearning a way of being.
In the coaching industry, I find that I often apply meaning in order to feel evolved and aware. I’m rethinking what I know about my coaching approach.
One new possibility for me is to live in what happened. I’m excited to see how much less drama and sensitivity I experience, and how much more room there is to love and be loved.
In a world where we are encouraged to be more emotional, I’m embracing more fact, less feeling. You know how much I love emotions so this is big deal for me.
This one insight is the tippy, tippy top of the Landmark iceberg. Most everything else is settling in and I’m finding my way with it.
Sign up for the Landmark Forum in a city near you. They’re all over the world. It’s probably the single, most important training I’ve ever done.
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With love and devotion to your special life,
P.S. I am NOT affiliated with Landmark. I loved their program and am recommending it from my heart because I want the best for you.