I don’t know if I want to break up with my business. I do know I’m not happy where I am.
That statement is empowering as hell.
I write to you with a muddled heart this afternoon.
I deeply love what I do. I am obviously passionate about coaching; the virtual nature of it, understanding motivation, inspiring women, getting to do and say whatever I want when I can muster the courage to do so.
I’m also disappointed because I want more.
I don’t desire an ordinary life. I want to jet off to Bali for 6 months, I want to spend some time in Texas and California, I want to sail in the Caribbean, I want to have real estate in our investment portfolio…heck, I want to have investments of any kind!
I deeply desire an exciting life. I love that about myself.
I also feel frustrated a lot these days because we don’t have the financial means to make these desires a reality. Since Preston is the breadwinner it’s easy for me to look to him to make changes.
Let’s not beat around the bush. My business is making very little money right now and I often feel ashamed about that. I feel as though I should be further along. I have influence. I’m having success. I have a great message. People I don’t know come up to me at events and introduce themselves because they watch my Daily Soul Sessions. I’m doing some great trainings. So why am I not making some significant income every month?
I know l have nothing to feel ashamed about and yet I do.
My shame isn’t serving a damn thing; my message, my growth, my clients, my marriage, my relationships.
It’s the very thing that’s keeping me stuck.
What I know for sure is that it’s time for a change. I desire change. I don’t know if it means putting my coaching skills to use in a job, getting a corporate coaching gig, or, getting a part time job to set us up for more success.
I desire to feel wonderful about who I am, and, how I’m contributing to myself and my family.
It’s not really about the money even though it is. That’s exactly why money is such a trigger.
Today I found myself saying to Preston, “Ok, so we want more money, but for what? To travel, to be debt free? We don’t even know. If we aim for nothing that’s exactly where we’ll land.”
I felt a breakthrough as I said it. I can’t put it into words yet.
I want more money, more significance, more success, more of the life I dream about.
Bottom line is we need more money to achieve some of that.
Yes, I could stay the course and “grind” it out, but whose to say anything will change a year or two from now? Financially speaking, nothing has changed from a year or two ago.
I keep thinking, there is no one way to do this.
What we are doing right now is no longer working for me, or Preston. He’s become so worried and stressed about providing, because it’s all on his shoulders, that he too feels stuck and scared.
He’s stuck doing something he doesn’t love and I’m stuck doing something I do love. (Kinda funny depending on the day)
While I might sound like I’m about to quit my coaching business (I’m not), or make some big life changes, I believe they are smaller than they might seem.
Brendon Burchard says that most of the time we are just 5 or 6 degrees off from our aligned course.
When we get back into alignment our life changes exponentially.
Let me tell you, I am ready for an Extravaganza!
My whole being is craving a celebration of who I am. My whole truth. A safe place to be open about what I desire without holding back. To say what I really want and see it’s possible.
Shame thrives in the dark and I don’t want to feel ashamed about what I really want. How about you?
Acknowledging our truth allows us to take responsibility for our un-lived life and, ultimately, create it.
Sunday, October 15th (just over a week away) is the day we will witness each other in desires that blow our minds. To dream big and celebrate the essence of who we are.
Will you join us? Secure your spot in the circle right here.
In 5 years, 10 years, 20 years, the last thing I want to do is look back and think, “Damn, I’m so far away from the life I envisioned for myself.”
I can’t let that happen. I won’t.
Are you with me?
If you are, tell me the one thing you want more than anything right now below in the comments.
If you want more doses of soul like this one, straight into your inbox every week, enter your name and email in the black box below.
In honor of your courage and mine,
P.S. Remember to get your Extravaganza ticket now if you’re a yes to attending.