In the 12 step world, where I spend a few hours every week, acronyms and slogans are life-saving tools. I use these to coach myself to a place of balance. Here are two of the former that keep me sane and on my side of the street. If you’re anything like me, It seldom goes well when I cross over.

How often do we make it about us? When I’m upset about what someone said or did you can often find me throwing a pity festival, party of one. I’m taking it personally. I regularly forget that what someone else is saying and doing is about them, not me. “It’s not about me!” I say this with vigor, quite regularly, as a way to jolt myself out of my victimhood. Usually, I might add, by way of a friend or coach who reminds me of the truth. I swear to God I take things personally more than I want to and Q-TIP saves me staying there way too long.

The keyword is voluntarily. I don’t have to make “suggestions” as to what someone should do or say because I know better. I’m not responsible for what others say and do. I can trust that people will evolve exactly as they are supposed to without me meddling. Doing so is at the heart of what it means to Love. LOVE already helps me get my thinking back on track and will save me many a mis-step for years to come.

I often remind my clients to let their spouses be their own person, and how to let go of resentment because they’ve made a situation about them. Since these two scenarios come up again and again, these two tools could save you hours of wasted time. 

How will LOVE AND QTIP help you feel more juicy? Share your comments below.

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So much love,

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